crushondeanlikeafairy:

sociopaths-have-the-box:

sociopaths-have-the-box:

My sister just found a cockroach in the shower and it touched her so she flipped out

Update: She just said she was afraid to pee because “what if there are cockroaches in the toilet and they crawl up my butt”

You dont UNDERSTAND!! I WAS NAKED AND THIS GIANT ASS MUTHA FUCKA TOUCHED ME!!! IT JUST FELL FROM THE HEAVENS AND FELT UP MY ARM WITH ITS GRODY LITTLE FEELERS AND THEN SAT UNDER MY WATER I USE FOR CLEANSING LAUGHIN AT ME!!

HOLY MOTHER OF HELL!!!
I WAS RELAXING, AND A FUCKING SPIDER INVADED MY BED AND CRAWLED UP MY AAAAARRRMMMM!!!
THEYRE ATTACKING!! NOW I CANT FIND THE FUCKIN BASTARD!!

sociopaths-have-the-box:

sociopaths-have-the-box:

My sister just found a cockroach in the shower and it touched her so she flipped out

Update: She just said she was afraid to pee because “what if there are cockroaches in the toilet and they crawl up my butt”

You dont UNDERSTAND!! I WAS NAKED AND THIS GIANT ASS MUTHA FUCKA TOUCHED ME!!! IT JUST FELL FROM THE HEAVENS AND FELT UP MY ARM WITH ITS GRODY LITTLE FEELERS AND THEN SAT UNDER MY WATER I USE FOR CLEANSING LAUGHIN AT ME!!

tentoes2:

Why did they cancel that show

(Source: thekingofqueens, via dickoloisamagicalgirl)

lanactrlaltdelrey:

Cunt again? It was odd how men … used that word to demean women when it was the only part of a woman they valued.

 sheriff-swan:

— Asha Greyjoy, A Dance With Dragons   (via scrlett)

WHERE’S THAT GIF OF THE JUDGE BANGING THE GAVEL AND GOING OOOOOOOOOOH

image

(via aryousavvy)

(Source: neolution, via dickoloisamagicalgirl)

(Source: galadreel, via jimmynokavs)

Rest of the World: Kilometers
America: No
Rest of the World: Celsius
America: No
Rest of the World: Daylight savings was last week
America: NO
Rest of the World: day month year
America: No
Rest of the World: drives on right side of the street
America: HELL YESSSS
UK: wait

elasticitymudflap:

when u really want a thing and someone offers to buy it for u

image

(via dickoloisamagicalgirl)

prewars:

smallgovernment:

at this point I’ve nearly forgotten that pirating movies and software is illegal

(Source: exeggcute, via sociopaths-have-the-box)

sam-ouinchester:

if you ever feel bad about your art please remember that sam winchester once posed as a sketch artist and made this

image

(Source: oddmints, via sociopaths-have-the-box)

smalldisgruntledcorgi:

tardis-mind-palace:

smalldisgruntledcorgi:

fun things to do in front of nerdy boys

intentionally mix up zelda and link
mispronounce “anime”
refer to anime as “japanese kids cartoons”
pronounce pokemon as pokey-mon
respond to everything they say with “oh yeah my baby brother likes that!”

I am a nerdy boy and I assure you the only reactions you would get from this are crying or outbursts of rage

you act like your tears aren’t EXACTLY what i want

(Source: cephalodogs, via dickoloisamagicalgirl)

axlxp:

punkphantom:

malformalady:

A man after a successful heart transplant, holding his old, diseased heart

metal as fuck

I love this so much

axlxp:

punkphantom:

malformalady:

A man after a successful heart transplant, holding his old, diseased heart

metal as fuck

I love this so much

(via dickoloisamagicalgirl)